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Having a Fictional Party? Don’t Invite These Characters!

Do you want a party, or do you want a showdown? If you really want to enjoy your party, don’t let him in (if you can).

Funke Adegbokiki
Published on July 24, 2023
3 min read
Fictional Villains
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It’s for your good, really.

As a book nerd, I have loved some fictional characters, cried over some, mocked a few, pulled my hair out for an annoying set, and loudly applauded the best of them all.

The other day, I thought about what a party with all these fictional characters would be like, and while I was imagining them, a character came to mind, and I immediately ruled him out.

For the love of all that is good, don’t invite him!

I then wondered which other fictional characters were best left out, which birthed this article. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Here we go:

Sherlock Holmes

I am a big fan, and I admire the dude. I mean, the guy is brilliant but as a party guest? The worst decision you can ever make. From the moment he opens his mouth, you can be sure someone will be mentally maimed for life. He is equipped to give you an embarrassment of a lifetime. He doesn’t have a filter and won’t even bother trying. A party with Sherlock Holmes in attendance would end before you could say spoilers.

Hercule Poirot

A more amiable and pleasant personality than Sherlock but more deadly. Except if you want to turn it into a murder mystery, don’t even invite him. He is the kind of character that pulls events to himself. I mean, murders seem to love him!

Ayoola

My sister the serial killer

This petite beauty is a no-no for your beloved guy friends and brothers. If you want to invite her in the hopes of setting her up with one of the guys, you have just signed the guy’s death warranty. She might look like an angel but, in reality, is a death merchant. Don’t even invite her sister either; I am being nice about it.

Mr. Hyde/Dr. Jekyll

As much as we love Dr. Jekyll, we can never say when Mr. Hyde would burst out, and we can’t go shocking the other guests to their death now, can we? He would have to take a pass.

Captain Jack Sparrow

Do you want a party, or do you want a showdown? If you really want to enjoy your party, don’t let him in (if you can). Don’t even let him learn you’re having a party. He will turn it into a circus show and make sure the guests leave a lot less wealthy than they came while being polite about it.

Hannibal Lecter

Did you invite him to a party or call him to come and feast? Please forget his impeccable manners, his brilliance, and his artistic talks. The risk outweighs the gain.

The Joker

I mean, you wouldn’t! It wouldn’t even cross your mind, right? Good! Because this one needs no explanation. Right? Because who sits down and thinks, ‘How do I end the lives of everyone at this party?‘ except a fellow psychopath?

Venom/Eddie Brock

While Eddie has good motives, we can’t say the same for Venom. If any of the guests get to him in any way, they will end up with a headless body. And surely you are planning to feed Venom, right? You do know they are two individuals in that body, right? And although he loves chocolate, he still needs to eat a proper meal. Cross out this Marvel character quickly!

Which one caught your fancy, and which other characters would you also not invite? Share your thoughts below!

Written by Funke Adegbokiki

A Bookworm

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